ArethaI just love this photo of Aretha, by the way. She looks like somebody just told her some ol’ side of the neck, crazy shit.

Growing up, there was this guy around town and I believe his name was Kareem. All I know is that everyone called him ‘Reem Love. Now ‘Reem Love had some kind of mental disability. He was a little slow or something. I dunno. He was always running around town by himself, so he couldn’t have been that bad off. I assume he was 3 or 4 years older than me. Anyway, the reason behind him being called ‘Reem Love is because all he did was holla at chicks. It’s like someone pulled him to the side one day, taking advantage of his disability, and told him that his purpose in life was to try to get a girl. Everyone from back home knows about ‘Reem Love and we’d try to avoid him at all costs. Well, unless you wanted a guaranteed laugh. It’s not right, but we were young! This cat would come up to you and ask if you had a man. He’d say you were fine and proceed to deliver his famous line. It never failed, “Tell your friends to get with my friends, and we can be friends.” HAHAHA. I wanna kill Diddy for feeding material to ‘Reem Love! He would pester you, follow you down the street. Just plain refuse to leave you alone UNLESS you shot back at him with the verbal version of kryptonite: “‘Reem, we can’t date. We cousins!” All you had to do was say you were his cousin and he’d back off instantly. “Oh, ok cuzzo. Word up.” I wonder what happened to that kid.

You would think, that with all the technological advances we’ve made in this world, that the good people over at The Wheel of Fortune would have devised a better way to spin that damned wheel. I hardly watch this show. I was checking it out one night because I didn’t get around to changing the channel after College Championship Jeopardy (by the way, I would smoke those fools on Jeopardy any day). Anyway, I took notice that Vanna “I’m totally useless but have a great lawyer and contract” White doesn’t turn the letters anymore. The letters just show up on the blocks when she flashes her million dollar smile at them or touches them, whichever comes first. Basically, she’s window dressing. I’m not mad though. Vanna is as much a part of the show as the letters a, e, i, o, and u (sometimes y). So what’s the deal with them making old ladies and overweight folks bend over to spin that hunking wheel? AND they still have to pick up the little free spin disc or jackpot wedge. There was more technology on Press Your Luck (no whammy NO WHAMMY!) and that was over years ago.

Earlier in the week, I was sitting on a bench talking on my cell phone. There was some man sitting on the other end of that bench. So while I’m yapping away, this dude turns to me (all rude, interrupting my call) and says “Happy Mother’s Day.” I reply, “Oh, I’m not a mother.” This fuckin’ genius’ retort is, “Well I’m not a father!” By the way, he said it with an attitude. Ok. Um, first of all, mother’s day was over 5 days away at the time. Secondly, wtf are you doing getting an attitude with me? Finally, do I look like somebody’s mother? Granted, every woman over a certain age (what’s that nowadays, 13) could possibly be a mother. But still… Oh and after about 3 minutes he turned to me again and asked for a dollar. Negro, please. I got kids to feed!

 I posted this over at OKP, but it made me laugh after reading it to myself. Someone was talking about going to Red Lobster to celebrate shit with your family, like it’s the go-to spot. Now, I’m sure that you’ve been privy to the Red-Lobster-Ain’t-Special! debates but still I had to ask myself: When I graduate next year, where the hell am I gonna take my family for dinner after the ceremony? My family hates really nice stuff. They’re just not used to it and they spend the entire time complaining about how much shit is and how they could get it cheaper at the so and so diner. I don’t even know where the red lobster is around here. I need to find out. They’d be comfy as shit with some cheddar biscuits. *slaps self on the forehead* I took my mom and uncle to Ruby Tuesdays for lunch… damned Ruby Tuesdays done went and changed their plates, napkins and menus to look a lil higher end and shit. Now my uncle acting like he ain’t hungry when usually he’s 1 plate from getting banned from the buffet. Arghhhh!

 I don’t understand how people go batty over Leonardo DiCaprio. He still looks like a little kid to me, just dressed in grown up clothes. He is not hot. He is not the most beautiful man. He is a little blonde boy who is just a good actor. Not stellar, not fabulous. Talk about over-hyped. I was watching VH1’s hottest hotties of the 90s or whatever it’s called. They had him on there and were gushing about his “breakout” role in Titanic. Um, Titanic sucked as a movie, y’all. The whole time Kate Winslet came off as a pedophile whore who was running around some lead bottomed boat with the kid from Growing Pains. 

 I prefer to buy brown eggs. Why? I dunno. It’s not that they’re any better tasting or better for you than white eggs. I just feel like the brown egg gets the shaft most of the time and, well, I want to support the brown egg. See, I try to fight racism/colorism in EVERY facet of my life!

More to come throughout the day…

1 Comment

Filed under Routine Ramblings

One response to “Rambling…

  1. eigoob ceps

    Anthony, his name’s Anthony. I just remembered

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