What part of the party game is this?

It’s Friday night and I’m staying in. I’m sittin’ on my couch, just finished watching American History X (for the 3rd time) and eating some Doritos. Oh, and my phone is blowing up. Phone calls and texts. Why? Folks want to know why I’m not at this party. They were asking me if I was going yesterday. Asked me today. Tonight, I got two phone calls from people standing on line at the jawn wanting to know how the party was inside. “I’m not there,” I said. I got a text asking me how the party was. “Dunno. Didn’t go” I replied. “Well do you know who did go?” He said. “I think x,y, and z went but um, I don’t know because I’m NOT THERE,” I replied. Then dude texts me, “Why Not?” Ughh At this point I’m frustrated and I text back saying, “I didn’t have a ride.”

ageism?

age·ism /ˈeɪdʒɪzəm/ Pronunciation Key – Show Spelled Pronunciation[ey-jiz-uhm] –noun
1. discrimination against persons of a certain age group.
2. a tendency to regard older persons as debilitated, unworthy of attention, or unsuitable for employment.

I’m an ageist. I think. I mean, not really. See when it really comes down to it I’m so freakin’ liberal and equal opportunity that I couldn’t seriously discriminate against someone for no reason other than the fact that they are elderly. Glad to have that disclaimer out of the way. Now on to the ignorance.

Even though I don’t think it’s okay to for real discriminate against old people, I don’t particularly like old people. On top of the many reasons NOT to like Senator John McCain, I especially do not like him because he is old. He looks old and sounds old and I bet he smells old. At those debates when he’s next to Senator Barack Obama, he looks doubly old. Not to mention he’s white and well, you know how that goes with aging. I wouldn’t vote for him or trust him, but I would like McCain more if he were, say 30 years younger.

Ol' Fox!

My grandpa’s 74 years old. I like him. I love him, actually. I like talking to him and hearing what he has to say even though he speaks really slowly sometimes. LOL. I like funny old people like Betty White and I like old foxes like Lena Horne.

Old ass Lassie phone

I really did not like the old attorney who supervised me on the case I had today – the case I lost :( That guy was no help whatsoever. Anytime I approached him for help he would ramble on and on about nonsense. He’s 76 by the way. While I’m trying to figure out the theory of the case, our case strategy, what our witnesses are going to say, which evidence we should enter in and how I should do certain things, he’s talking about when he was in the navy. No lie, instead of letting me ask him about the details of the case, he told me about how he used to use those phones that you had to crank up. You know, the kind they had on Lassie? Old dude… STFU! No one cares! Apparently, he does this all the time to everyone. He’s known for just rambling on. Oh, and he had hair coming out of his nose. What’s up with that?

I’m really just upset about the way the case went today. I do not like to lose. I am a good speaker and I am usually very good when it comes to litigation. To be honest, I wasn’t as prepared on this case as I should have been, but I can place some of that onto Father Time, Esq. There were witnesses that should have been subpoenaed who were not. Exhibits not clearly marked. Ugh.

I know I’ll be old. Well, at least you hope you’ll live to be old, right? I have dreams of being old and fabulous like Lena or Tina Turner (those legs!). I certainly don’t want to be old and annoying. I just want to chill and feed my grandkids Werther’s Originals.

where old people belong: in ads for butterscotch