Tag Archives: Kandi Burruss

RHoATL, s2e4: such a happy family

Lisa's gym face

Last week left me wanting for some serious wig snatching and not that tease of a tug Sheree gave Kim. Thankfully, the episode was saved by Dwight’s fabulous party and boob inspections. Bravo, don’t fail me now!

Question: Is it necessary for Lisa to work out in a full face of makeup and that hair all down her back? I know when I’m up in the gym (or when I WAS up in the gym), I didn’t have time for all of that. Mascara all sweating down into my eyes and that hair is like having a heater on the back of your neck. Hmph. Yeah, it’s television but I thought Lisa went hard on her workouts.

I know this is not the nicest thing to say, but Kim’s children are terribly boring. I don’t want to see them ever again on this show. Especially when I’m subjected to scenes where two adults and two children cannot come together and figure out whether “sightseeing” is an adjective or a verb (FYI, it’s a verb). After acting like dictionaries don’t exist, the nanny tells Kim’s daughter that she’s going to hell for rapping her prayer (you can’t make this stuff up). Nanny’s job wasn’t in too much jeopardy at that point, though, because we know Kim is the queen of empty threats. Just like she says one tihng to Nene and Sheree and never follows up on it. Kim could’ve axed the nanny right then and there and she probably should have because a little later, Kim got the heads up that the nanny had left the kids home alone to make a tampon run. Damn.
Question: why does Kim need a nanny? She doesn’t work, right? How come she can’t raise her kids?

Kandi attempted to get her family together for a photo shoot, a la the Sears Portrait Studio. You know, the ones where everyone is dressed alike? Wheretheydothatat? That’s still in style? No, it’s not. Kandi is just bass ackwards but we knew that when she signed up to marry some dude with 6 kids and 4 different mothers (and you’ve only known him for 8 months)? Who is she trying to convince with her “we are a happy family” spiel? I think she might say it 3 times an episode, every episode. We don’t believe you, boo. I know her momma doesn’t believe one single bit of it the way she removed herself from the “family” picture. Continue reading

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RHoATL, S2E3: Hair we go again!

Last week, Bravo hoodwinked us into watching as we anticipated a wig snatch-off of epic proportions. Who am I kidding, we would’ve been watching anyway!

This week picked up right where we left off… with Sheree, Nene and Kim arguing in a nice restaurant, causing a scene. After proclaiming “I’m gonna whoop her ass,” Sheree went after Kim. They shouted, got all up in each others’ faces and Sheree just TUGGED Kim’s wig. A tug?! Ugh, I’m so utterly disappointed! While Sheree tried to make a distinction between weave and wigs “I can’t take mine off like you can”), Kim called her out as a lazy gold digger trying to live off of her ex’s money. http://www.truthhurts.com. Real talk though… what kind of grown woman with class, status and self-respect gets into a shouting argument on the street? To deal, Kim called her friend (of 11 years), Jody, who drove from Alabama. I get the impression that Jody doesn’t want to be dragged into Kim’s madness and was focused on the free meal courtesy of Bravo (you know they’re treating!). How odd, though, because as far as we know, Kim has no friends outside of the Housewives.

I like Nene and all but I think she’s wrong in all of this. She’s trying to play all sides. Friends with Kim and then kee-keeing behind her back with Lisa and Sheree. She invited Kim out to talk and clear the air. Yet when Kim and Sheree were violating each others’ personal space, she made a lame attempt at breaking it up. To me it looked as if she was enjoying it, especially because she laughed about it with Lisa afterward. Anyway you slice it, it’s shady biz.

Always adding some much needed levity to the show, Dwight popped on screen planning a fabulous 50th birthday party with animals coming from the ceiling and half naked men and women painted like wildlife. In all seriousness, Dwight seems about his business when it comes to party planning. He wants his shrimp cold and crisp, his hot food steaming and the breasts pushed up! Sheree shouldn’t have been messing with that temper tantrum throwing planner she had and called Dwight! I love him so much!

Kandi (and that dreadful haircolor not found in nature) shows up at Dwight’s extravaganza, meeting him for the first time. He gives her the once over, felt up her boobs and inspected her feet. She passed. Kandi was making a first impression on Sheree as well who, for now, sees Kandi as a kindred spirit. I have a feeling that might change in the future. Continue reading

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RHoATL, S2E2: scared? say you scared.

YES! Back again after all of that dreadful drama last week! Did you know the season premier of RHoATL attracted over four million viewers? This is America’s guilty pleasure for sure.

In the spirit of working it all out, Nene wanted to get together with Sheree and Lisa to talk with Kim. While I think it’s good to talk it out, she wants to see who said what. Honestly, that’s some kid shit for real.

Is EVERY man in Atlanta gay? I have not seen these women with one straight male gay friend. Of course Dwight is the G.O.A.T. Kim has her very one gayboyfriend, Dean Pardue (aka White Chocolate) who is also a stylist. (Is any gay man in Atlanta NOT a stylist?) Yo, all I could think of when Kim was trying on her “custom made fashions” was what is wrong with her boobs? Listen, you can’t pretend to be fabulous with a botched boob job and a tacky blonde wig. You just can’t. Question of the episode #1: Why does Kim Zolciak need an assistant? That heifer is on that Tommy ish… she ain’t got no job!

Blog fam, can we be real? Do you really think Sheree needs a gun to protect herself? She’s not living in the SWAT ya know. She’s living in most people’s dream. That gun isn’t for protection. That piece is so her ex knows he better not let THIS house get foreclosed upon or it’s going to be some drama. WHO GON’ CHECK ME BOO? On a related note, kudos to sidekick Tania for really knowing her gun/military stuff. Continue reading

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RHoATL, S2E1: The biddies are back!

Real Housewives of ATL Logo BannerBravo stays serving up some reality goodness and I’m eating it up. The network had the good sense to bring back the popular guilty pleasure Real Housewives of Atlanta for a second season. This time around though, producers ditched NBA wife DeShawn Snow because, well, she was boring as hell. Maybe that’s a credit to DeShawn because boring on this show means no drama, no secret sugar daddies or imaginary fashion lines. S2E1 brings us former Xscape standout, singer, songwriter Kandi Burruss. Not content to let Tiny (Tiny & Toya) get all the reality shine, Kandi has already been kicking up dust before the season premier due to alleged beef with RHoATL vet and fan fave Nene. So okay, on to the season premier!

Yes! Dwight showed up within the first 5 minutes! This season is awesome already! He came by Nene’s new crib (next to Lisa’s home) and hated on her drapes, fake plants and karaoke machine. Why is Dwight so damn sexual though? He spent last season talking about his “tool box” and how he has sex 3x a day. Now, while showing Nene how to pop the cork on a bottle of Champagne, he gets lewd… “Ease it off and let it come naturally. Put your hand on top and feel it. Come on Nene… Try it. Ooh it’s coming… Did you enjoy that?” Ooh boy, you so bad!

I just have to say I need to know who casts these shows and what did Big Papa pay them to let his sidepiece Kim get put on? I KNOW there are hotter white women in ATL. Kim figured she’d go to what looked like the local senior citizen’s center to speak to a psychic. Why homegirl needed a palm reader to tell her that Big Papa ain’t about shit is beyond me. Despite being called out repeatedly on the Season 1 reunion for her tacky wig, Kim is still rocking those Barbie locks 6 inches away from her real hairline! The nerve of some people! Continue reading

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