I bleed blue: A “period” piece, Pt. II

Continued from Pt. I

I am an adult. I know other adults. I know adult women who are still afraid to talk about their periods. O RLY? I always say that if someone doesn’t realize that you, a grown ass, pre-menopausal woman, sheds her uterine lining every 28 days, well then there’s something wrong with THEM. What is the big freaking deal?

Of course when I was younger I tried to hide the fact that I was on my period. As mentioned in Part I, I didn’t really have anyone sit down and talk to me about my period. I certainly didn’t have any empowering messages related to me. Everything we saw and heard told us that it was imperative we conceal our menses or else risk alienating every man around us and opening ourselves up to ridicule. You can’t deny that women (including young girls) are expected to uphold a sexualized ideal for men, which includes hiding the most boring, ordinary and non-sexual facts of life, i.e. using the bathroom, farting, body hair removal, applying or removing make-up. On top of all of that, you’ve got to conceal your period because since many folks do not have sex when a woman is menstruating, that time directly contradicts a sexualized ideal for men. Oh boy, not only has the feminine products industry done a number on us, but we’ve got the overarching patriarchal society imposing shame on women. Great!

I bleed blue: A “period” piece, Pt. I

“We bleed blue” is a common sentiment espoused by Tar Heel fans. If you check this blog with any regularity, you know that I bleed bluer than a chainsaw massacre at Smurf Village. Other than that (and the occasional reference to nobility), “blue blood” just makes me think of those silly feminine hygiene commercials that use the thin blue liquid to compare absorbencies. As thoughts in my head tend to jump from one to the next rather quickly, I started to think about my disdain for the feminine hygiene industry.

The so-called feminine hygiene industry is so freaking insulting to me. The whole business is predicated on society’s belief that women are nasty, dirty beings who need to be secreted away and disinfected. So much could be said about this. People write their theses on the subject. Books sit in libraries and on Barnes & Noble shelves on the issue. There’s a documented history of how the industry contributes to the warping of the female mind, particularly the impressionable minds of young girls. I can’t and will not go into all of that here. Instead, I’ll just focus on a couple of points relating to one’s period: Cleanliness (part I) and Secrecy (part II).

Mittelschmerz

A bit of TMI here:

What’s mittelschmerz? It’s German for “middle pain”. It’s also the pain some women (nearly 20%) feel in their abdomen’s when they’re ovulating, that’s releasing an egg from one of their ovaries. I wanted to post about it, because some people don’t believe me when I say I’m ovulating. I totally know when I’m ovulating because I can feel it. Ouchies. It hurts. Ovulation pain can range from a mild twinge to severe discomfort and usually lasts from minutes to hours. In some cases, a small amount of vaginal bleeding or discharge may occur. Some women also experience nausea during painful ovulation, especially if the pain is severe. Thank goodness I’m not THAT bad. I’d be pissed to high hell if I bled or vomited every time I ovulated!

According to Wikipedia:

Mittelschmerz is believed to have a variety of causes:

* Follicular swelling: The swelling of follicles in the ovaries prior to ovulation. While only one or two eggs mature to the point of being released, a number of follicles grow during the follicular phase of the menstrual cycle (non-dominant follicles atrophy prior to ovulation). Because follicles develop on both sides, this theory explains mittelschmerz that occurs simultaneously on both sides of the abdomen.

* Ovarian wall rupture: The ovaries have no openings; at ovulation the egg breaks through the ovary’s wall. This may make ovulation itself painful for some women.

* Fallopian tube contraction: After ovulation, the fallopian tubes contract (similar to peristalsis of the esophagus), which may cause pain in some women.

* Smooth muscle cell contraction: At ovulation, this pain may be related to smooth muscle cell contraction in the ovary as well as in its ligaments. These contractions occur in response to an increased level of prostaglandin F2-alpha, itself mediated by the surge of leutinizing hormone (LH).

* Irritation: At the time of ovulation, blood or other fluid is released from the ruptured egg follicle. This fluid may cause irritation of the abdominal lining.

Whatever the cause, this shit is not cute. Standing up hurts. Not debilitating pain, but enough to make me pause and say “ho, sit down.” So yeah, maybe the baby shower I went to today got my hormones going and caused my ovarian wall to rupture. Je ne sais pas.

I like the word “mittelschmerz” tho. It sounds like something you should say when giving a toast!